Thursday 21 February 2008

Food, glorious food

The Football Fanatic came home from a night out during the week at 3.30am. With no thought for anyone stupid enough to be asleep at this hour she shouted up the stairs those oh, so familiar words:
'MUM! Is there anything to eat? I'm STARVING!'

I love my eldest child. I would do anything for her. Anything, that is, except get up and start cooking in the middle of the night. I explained this to her.
Fairly miffed, she said:
'Right. I'll get myself something then.'

Bravely ignoring the ice-cold hand which gripped my heart at the thought of her going into the kitchen I decided to wait and see what happened. Ten minutes later she came clattering into my bedroom carrying a tray.

'I've made myself a bit of a buffet,' she said with childlike glee.
She plonked herself down on my bed and I watched in fascination as she ate:

1 sausage sandwich
3 slices of ham
1 chicken drumstick
half a large tub of coleslaw
1 packet of ready salted crisps
1 raspberry yoghurt
and 1 can of Pepsi Max

while telling me who did, who didn't and who said what to who
during the course of the evening.

Finally, she went to bed. As we both have to get up at 5am so she can go to work, this left us with...oh...a good hour's sleep each. I went into her bedroom at the appointed time, somewhat bleary-eyed, to make sure she was awake, to find her applying mascara with one hand and straightening her hair with the other.

'Oh, good,' I said 'You're up.'
'Course I am,' she replied brightly. 'Is there anything to eat? I'm starving'.



24 comments:

Anonymous said...

Where do you come up with this stuff? You crack me up. Oh, to be young, skinny, blonde, and energetic again...

Mrs. Fox said...

Wow. Wow. A.) Kudos for not killing her because, personally, if someone woke me up at 3:30 AM I would be "Insane Harpy Angry." B.) Her diet is horrifying. C.) This reminds me how old I've become because I can remember being able to stay up all night and then be spry the next day. Now days . . . see A.

God bless you . . . and her.

Kit said...

3:30?!??!? LOL!!! Remind me a few years to get shock collars for my girls...

And the "light snack!" Sounds like a bear got loose in the campground. If I ate a quarter of that I'd gain 5 pounds in the blink of an eye. As Jennifer said, "oh to be young...AND have an overachieving thyroid gland!"

Well, my dear, I do hope you can manage a nap today. I am off to Bedfordshire myself, with a small Boy, a larger Girl, and a pudgy cat all piled in with me (beloved is working overnight at the airport due to bad incoming storm...)

Maggie May said...

At 3.30 am I am not very nice!
You have infinite patience! I wonder what brought on that ravenous attack? What ever it was, I think you were all lucky she wasn't sick!

Casdok said...

A 'bit' of a buffet! Lol!!

BarnGoddess said...

I am still blonde but my young and skinny days are long gone...

great story!

:)you are quite nice at 3:30 am.

Laura Paxton said...

Oh, joy...THIS is what I have to look forward to?!? ACK!!

Anonymous said...

Good to know! I'm a chubby red-head!

Lizzy in the Burbs said...

Hi, there!

Thanks so much for stopping by my blog and leaving me your nice comment! I love hearing from someone new!

I was just reading over some of your previous posts, and laughing! You are very funny! I can somewhat understand what you go through, I have two boys, but my SIL has four girls and I see what she goes through, yikes! While I'm sure you can't imagine your life without them, they can be a handful, can't they? My four nieces are each so unique in their own way, just like your girls are all so different from one another. Sure makes life interesting! Take care and hope things look up for you soon!

Jane said...

Oh, no! 3.30am! You are a saint! I am not very sociable, shall we say, at that time of night. I'd have been furious.
How old is she? - just trying to work out how long I've got before I get to this point!

Daryl said...

Of course you didnt kill her for bringing her snack in and sharing her evening with you .. you're insane but in such a lovely way

david mcmahon said...

Right, so your eldest is related to my second child, then!!

qualcosa di bello said...

this would be funny if it had not already happened at our home too. sigh. the only differences in our stories would include the throwing of a load of laundry in at 3:30am followed by the incessant sloshing sound that still haunts my sleep!

Rebekah said...

I love this. I'm reading and preparing for my life in a few years with my four. I have 3 girls and a boy. It's going to get fun.....

Renae said...

This is hilarious. But also such a sweet picture of the friendship you share with your daughter.

I'm embarrassed to say I remember pulling things like that when I was a teen, keeping my dear mother up all hours telling her every detail of my evening. She always listened gladly.

She is a saint, and I realize now I was a wretched child! LOL! I have a daughter approaching her teen years. I suppose payback is coming my way!!!!!

Amrita said...

oh dear Jackie you are an ace.

The buffet was very varied. Did you have some too?

Eldest has a hearty appitite, she works hard too.

i am just laughing. I tell my Mum your stories. I want my sister to read this.

the rotten correspondent said...

Good lord. I had trouble visualizing having your plate taken away at an all you can eat buffet until I read this. Yikes.

And at 3:30 in the morning, no less. You are a superhero. A superhero with amazing graphic finding capabilities!

Jenny of Elefantz said...

You know, aside from the funny bits (and believe me I have had a good laugh!), the thing that hit me was that she came and sat with you and told you everything about her night...that's something a lot of mothers don't get to be a part of. It shows just how great a mum you are! I used to shudder at what my eldest daughter shared with me (she's almost 29 now) but she always said "Mum, I don't want to lie to you or have people tell tales on me...I just want you to know the truth from me." She's turned out to be one of my closest friends.
She also had (and has!!) an appetite you can relate to. ;-)

MarmiteToasty said...

LOL@your post, I thought it was only sons that did the #Im hungry' plea in the middle of the night....

She made a meal fit for a king lmfao...

And how the hell do they do it, get up with only a few hours sleep.. did we ever do that?

x

Akelamalu said...

Thanks for dropping by my blog and taking the time to comment.

This so reminds me of when our youngest son used to come home in the early hours of the morning ready to talk! I could never resist. Don't you just love 'em?

I had a quick gander through some of your other posts and I have to say I love the way you write - straight from the heart and no b*****it! I'll be back to read more. :)

Pam said...

omgoodness...i would not have been as patient. i would have been totally grouchy. and what the heck? where does all this food go? i once could do that, but it came back to bite me in the ass in my later years lol oh i remember the days of getting one hour sleep then being up for work...it's what i used to do when my x and i first started dating. the things you do for love lmao

Melissa in Mel's World said...

Oh my gosh...you are too stinkin' funny! That is awesome! I wish the aliens would come and eat all the skinny blondes first...no seriously, I don't, but it would be a tad funny...don't you agree?

Salute said...

She is so correct....that's a part of mini buffet.

Michal said...

you are a great mum. to be there for her at 3.30 am (even if you weren't going to make her food at that unholy hour) and to sit and talk with her about her night.
i wandered over from david mcmahon's blog and i'm glad i did.