Me: What's that?
Him: It's a hoover.
Me: I can see that. What's it for?
Him: You said the hoover wasn't picking up properly. I bought a new one.
Me: Oh right. Thanks. Did you get the milk?
Him: I forgot.
It could have been worse, I suppose. And I did notice that there wasn't any of the usual '...don't see why I should be buying appliances for a house I don't live in anymore...' nonsense.
Perhaps now is an opportune moment to tell him that the dryer's packed up and the dishwasher's been on the blink since last August.
In yet another appliance-buying moment, the Football Fanatic has invested in this:
Apparently it is known as an ipod dock. I was quite looking forward to it's arrival because this lot have broken two of the USB ports on the computer, so to charge the various ipods in the house necessitates unplugging my keyboard. The 'dock' would eliminate the need for this because it can charge everybody's ipod without disturbing me.
Also, there was the sales pitch....
".......a beautiful, compact sound system with an integrated Universal Dock that fills the room with rich, audiophile-quality sound......"
Perhaps that only applies to a normal household. In the hands of this lot the noise reached decibel levels that I am certain are hazardous to human health. The strains of 'Glory, glory, Man United' which wafted up the stairs could only be equalled by a crowd of 76,000 people at Old Trafford. Once they had figured out how to jam the volume button onto full, the music began, and, much as I am used to feeling there has been a minor earhquake in the house, I can honestly say that, two floors above them, the ground was actually shaking.
My usual line of 'FOR GOD'S SAKE, TURN IT DOWN' was useless. Have you ever seen a programme about The Ministry of Sound in Ibiza? If you have, you've got the idea.
I gave it up as a bad job in the end. I can only thank God that we are detatched and double glazed. Otherwise, the neighbours could be forgiven for thinking that they're spending Easter week in a caravan somewhere on the outskirts of Ayia Napa.
25 comments:
Most men wouldn't have a clue what a Hoover is!
Suggestion: Apple sells this USB PLUG that goes into a wall socket and then you plug the iPod's USB into it. It charges MUCH faster than connecting to the computer. When its fully charged you can sync it w/iTunes on your computer much faster .. I tell everyone I know - and some I dont know - to buy of these when they buy an iPod. In the US they cost $25 and are worth every pence since you can take them w/when you travel.
I am however extremely in awe of the hoover .. did you ever get the milk?
Went out for milk and came back with a hoover!!!!!!
Love it!
Love the Hoover. Listen. Being a Yank, I'm not sure exactly what "double glazed" means. I'm always interested in gathering more British slang.
Thanks very much! And, today is much much better, thank you!!
For us, it has been a recent wave of "Hannah Montana" songs and Wow Worship. I much prefer the Wow Worship, although Hannah Montana isn't bad. It beats the Barney and Sesame Street songs from a few years back. :-)
I want a Hoover . . .
--r
Tsk ... I wish someone would go out and buy me a hoover. Mine is worse than useless and driving me nuts. Still, after buying those rabbits, I guess he's trying to appease you ;-) x
I got myself an Oreck last year (the one with the 21 year warranty). I'm 38 so I thought I got myself a pretty good investment - if the company stays in business (and that looks good). I love the 8 pound sucker!!
I must be seriously thick. I hadn't realised that the Father didn't live with you. I'd picked up on the fact that things were a bit strained but hadn't realised you didn't live together. Blimey, 5 kids solo is a tall order. I salute you.
MMoF XX
Well this was obviously a peace offering after the episode with the rabbits!
My favourite vacuum is my "Henry", stands a bit of neglect & is ever faithful. For readers in distant lands, no Henry is not my husband! It is a little red cylinder vacuum with a face, called Henry!
Funny, I came home from work the other day to find that the hubby had replaced the usual computer desktop wallpaper with Man U logos. It was his subtle way of letting me know Arsenal had slipped down the charts. Argh!
Pour a glass of wine, light some scented candles, - - - - - then switch the electric off at the meter ! ! ! Peace and quiet.
Nice hoover by the way.
Hmmm, we've had similar retail distraction incidents ... but I can't deny that I'm just as guilty as 'im indoors.
Hi, I have come over from Kitty's to visit. I have enjoyed reading your posts! I will be back.
such shopping distraction deserves to be applauded ... otherwise it will be impossible for me to claim 'i am just popping out to tesco' when really i am hot-footing it into town to window shop for shoes.
Typical! I'm sorry I hadn't cottoned on that you were on your OWN with 5 girls! I worked out things were (are?) a bit tense but 5 hormonal girls on your own...How do you do it?
Anyway, great post. Again! My advice - I inform the teenager (and the 10 year old is getting there now) that the whole POINT of having children is so that they can go to the shop for milk! Especially since they drink most of it. And they can take their ipods with them. Result.
Award for you at my place. Come over and pick it up!
Ipod Dock - I've got one of those, and they are smart. Tho' mine came from Tesco, so perhaps it's not that cool? Hoover v. Milk - it's a non-starter as far as blokes are concerned. M :)
Hi MoTL -
Been to archives as suggested! Just wanted to say, well, "Very balanced" comes to mind! Might sound daft but hope you know what I mean. I think you have dealt with a situation without letting it embitter you and that is truly admirable.
That's enough on a public forum! Just wanted to let you know I empathise and take my hat off to you. (But I like my hat so I'll keep it if that's ok![grin])
Thank you for very kind comments at mine. Keep blogging!
That is a pretty snazzy Hoover although how one could confuse a request for milk with a need for a Hoover is a bit confusing -but then too, considering this is the male of the species doing that shopping -guess it is all self-explanatory right there then isn't it?
The Hoover story confirms my believe that certain men are able to handle only one job at a time. ;-)
Hmph, and you said I could come over? I'd just be swopping one mad house for another! (Grin)
Nice to see the hubby still has some uses. Our house is divided between Man U and Fulham, gets a bit heated on occassion. I love it when the footie is on (not that I watch, but it allows me to hide hugging my laptop in peace).
If you send him out for something a little stronger than milk, do you think he'll bring back someone to run the hoover? That's what I want. I love your rabbits - they are so cute! But beware, they eat everything (electric cords, wood moldings, books, everything) in their sight.
I just want to say thank you for your 'comment' this morning .. only the mother of 5 girls would be able to say that one word and convey so much .. and since I was clearly in need of a calm word I truly love you for it. Truly.
Turn the hoover on and drive the noisy ones outside. Works wonders in my house. Our machine is so noisy that I soon get the place to myself!
TFOTL is funny, and quite sweet i thought. But also couldn't help thinking, 'but he forgot the milk'. No wonder my husband thinks I'm an ungrateful cow. Do you have a megaphone? I do, and it is the most useful piece of kit I own. No more shouting, no more children pretending they didn't hear...it even has a siren function. I love it.
Pigx
Wow a hoover. Did it taste nice in the coffee?
That's pretty good really, although if he had got the milk as well that would have been amazing!
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