Lies Your Mother Told You
from
'The Mums' Book - For the Mum Who's Best at Everything'
by Alison Maloney
If you swallow chewing gum it will wind itself around your heart
If you don't wait an hour after eating to go swimming, you will get a cramp and die
If you pull ugly faces the wind will change and you'll stay like that
One hundred strokes with a brush is good for your hair
Eat your carrots - they'll make you see in the dark
Don't crack your knuckles - you'll get arthritis
Feed a cold, starve a fever
If you eat all your crusts, they'll make your hair curl
If you go out with wet hair you'll catch a cold
Chicken soup is good for colds
(Actually, this one's true. Chicken soup is thought to boost the immune system by stopping the movement of white blood cells that stimulate the release of mucus. Also, it's packed with nutrition, is easy to swallow and will keep you hydrated).
So, how many lies did your mother tell you?
And more importantly, how many have you told?
29 comments:
My mum told me all of those!!
I can quite honestly say i have never lied to my son! :)
never heard the one about gum winding around your heart or if you eat your crust your hair will curl...those are just hilarious lol
I would laugh but then I would cough .. I remember both the arthritis one and the face freezing one .. heard both of those a lot .. interesting my neck which I never cracked has the arthritis and my knuckles, thank you are just fine. That book is worth every pence sent on it.
And thank you ((Jackie)) for mothering me ..
Well, here is a lie I told myself: "I will never, ever, ever use my own saliva to clean my child's face." (I said this to myself as a child.)
But lo and behold, I have done it. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
--r
My Mum said those, too. But she also insisted she never lied!
"I never lie" she would say...
Who am I to believe?
Confused
Ireland
I told my sons that Action Man loved fresh fruit & vegetables.................
LOL! I have had all those told to me as a child - except the chewing gum would wind round my stomach. And chewing hair would mean I would get a ball of hair in my stomach and die...
I have to admit to telling most of these lies too, but I have always done it with a wink and a nudge and been careful to differentiate between old wives tales and truth. I can still tell them to eat carrots with a smile if they want to see their way to the toilet at night.... ;0)
Each and every one (still laughing), and I still use a couple of them with my kids.
When they were younger I told all mine the waste disposal had a crocodile living in it. My son still believes this is true (I wish he'd stop sneak feeding it all the cold meat from the fridge).
All of the above - every single one. And I lie about the presence of vegetables all the time. It's shaming!
As a competitive swimmer, yes, I copped that warning several times.
Yes, I heard all of those from my Mother and Grandmother too. And I think I've passed them all on to my kids! M :)
'don't go out in your slippers!', 'Don't speak with a regional accent'! but in fact those were commands rather than lies weren't they?!
Pigx
i have never forgiven my mother for telling me that father christmas exists. i blame all subsequent psychological problems on that.
of course i don't tell shark, squirrel and tiger about father christmas.
I say it is the tree in the garden that has fairies in it.
I tell a few of these, and have made up some of my own for my own convenience. I never understood "feed a cold, starve a fever".
Does it mean (1) "If you've got a cold, eat lots; if you've got a fever, don't eat".
Or does it mean (2) "If you eat a lot when you've got a cold, you won't get a fever"?
Or is it (3) Something else altogether and I have completely missed the point?
I ate crusts till they came out of my ears, & I still didn't get the curls I desperately wanted!
For GoneBackSouth-
I have said that one som many times this week! As I understand it (and it isn't a lie) - you should feed a cold i.e. eat a proper diet with a cold but starve a fever i.e. if it turns into feverish high temperature shivers with clear evidence of virus, 24 hours boiled (sterilised) water then eat. Flushes it through. Probably lies.
Plenty fluids and paracetamol. And sympathy. That works.
(With apologies to Mother of This Lot for hijacking her comments. Just had to smile when I've been trying to feed the boys up to ward off any worsening colds...)
My mother told me all of the above and I still believe them to be true!! The only one I tell my children is that "wine makes mummy clever". I love that one.
My mother told me all of the above and I still believe them to be true!! The only one I tell my children is that "wine makes mummy clever". I love that one.
No, it's "if you swallow your gum it will stay in your stomach for 7 years."
I'm still not sure if I disbelieve that yet... :)
"If you eat your beets you'll grow big boobs."
I guess it wasn't actually a lie because I never ate my beets and, well...
My grandmother was VERY big on the one about the wind changing - I'm starting to wonder if she had a 'thing' about wind?!
My mum used to say the gum would stick my innards together - I tell my daughter something similar about chewing her hair :-D
x
My parents used the one about not eating the watermelon or apple seeds, cause they'll grow out your ears!
I tease my kids with some, but we make it clear that they are said in jest.
I've heard and probably said a lot of those! Well it passes the time of day doesn't it and kids are so gullible.
I can't think of one thing. But, I did work graveyard last night, and I haven't gone to sleep yet, so my brain is pretty much mush. I'll have to think a little harder and get back to you. I love, love, love the retro picture. Where do you find them?
My mum also said similar things. They said, if you don ;t listen/obey the beggarman will come and get you.
Oh yes there certainly were a few that my mum told me...but I think the only one I passed on to my girls was the chicken soup...
I was told that if i bit my dirty finger nails and ate apple pips it would help to grow a tree out the top of my head........honest!! I was always confused as to how this would work!!
I've heard these statements called "Momisms". I heard all of those but one of my favorite "momisms" is "you can't heat dirty air." Meaning that every day our windows were opened up to air out the house "because you can't heat dirty air."
I think there might be scientific evidence for this one:) LOL
WHAT!!! You're telling me they're NOT all true!!!
Post a Comment